"Jonas R." <hihi@hihi.dk> wrote in message
news:41f69454$0$270$edfadb0f@dread12.news.tele.dk...
> Faldt lige over den her tråd på
www.s2forum.com alt for sjovt. Håber man
kan
> læse tråden uden at være logget ind.
>
http://www.s2forum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=7064&page=1&pp=15
>
> MVH
>
> Jonas R.
Gammel, men stadig go'.
The Circle Fly
During a traffic stop a police officer is swatting at a fly that is circling
around his head, and blurts out what kind of dang fly is that anyhow.
The traffic offender replies, "that's a circle fly."
The officer replies that he's never heard of a "circle fly."
The offender replies circle flies are usually found circling around a horses
@$$.
Enraged, the police officer says, "are you calling me a horses @$$?", to
which the traffic offender replied, "no sir, but you can't fool a circle
fly."
---
A Farmers Claim
A farmer who's been involved in a terrible road accident with a large truck
ended up in court fighting for a big compensation claim.
"I understand you're claiming damages for the injuries you're supposed to
have suffered?" Stated the counsel for the insurance company.
"Yes, that's right," replied the farmer, nodding his head.
"You claim you were injured in the accident, yet I have a signed police
statement that says that when the attending police officer asked you how you
were feeling, you replied, 'I've never felt better inn my life.' Is that the
case?"
"Yeah, but." stammered the farmer.
"A simple yes or not will suffice," counsel interrupted quickly.
"Yes," Replied the farmer.
Then it was the turn of the farmer's counsel to ask him questions. "Please
tell the court the exact circumstance of events following the accident when
you made your statement of health," his lawyer said.
"Certainly," replied the farmer. "After the accident my horse was thrashing
around with a broken leg and my poor old dog was howling in pain. This cop
comes along, takes one look at my horse and shoots him dead. "Then he goes
over to my dog, looks at him and shoots him dead too. Then he come straight
over to me and asked me how I was feeling. "Now, mate, what the heck would
you have said to him?"
---
The Speed Limit
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a
State Police Officer see's a car puttering along at 22 MPH.
He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"So he
turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.
Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the
front seat and three in the back, wide eyed and white as ghosts.
The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I
was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"
"Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know
that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other
drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly
twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly.
The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that
"22" was the route number, not the speed limit.
A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing
out her error.
"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car
OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep
this whole time," the officer asks.
"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 142."
---
Trooper's Ball
A state trooper pulls over a car for speeding and the female driver says
"I guess you want to sell me some tickets to the Trooper's Ball."
The trooper responded that "Troopers don't have balls, maam."
After he realized what he said, he simply walked back to his car and drove
off.
Even cops don't win them all.
---
Kør nu pænt - det er så dumt at dumpe til ligsynet!
Mvh
Aragorn_DK
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